So I just had a big cry – the super runny nose, shoulder sobbing, feel sorry for myself cry. I’ve been in Munnar for nearly a month and it’s time to move on. It was time to move on last week but my mini bus was cancelled, it was time yesterday and the bus was cancelled and again today it was cancelled.
I’m not crying cause my bus was cancelled.
I’m crying because it’s the part of my trip where my plan has come to an end. Munnar is safe, the next step I’m walking into the unknown and yes thats exciting and who knows what’s around the corner but I feel quite lonely and a little bit overwhelmed.
I’m sharing this because there is a tendency for me to project all the good things about my trip…it’s not all plane sailing in my world…I’m very good at getting overwhelmed.
I read an article about the ‘motherhood challenge’ on Facebook which made me reflect on the inadequacy I feel not being a parent. Like by being unable to take part in the challenge I don’t measure up or something (I don’t actually believe that on an intellectual level).
So it got me thinking about the smug chair I’m possibly sitting in whilst being here in India, not having to work and deal with the everyday normal. I’m not going to lie, I’m having an awesome time but social media is a funny old beast, just one big vacuum of projecting the good and concealing the bad. I haven’t expressed my monthly (premenstrual) overwhelming cries or that my sleep pattern is buggered or that I feel shit occasionally. I guess we’re all just human and doing our own thing as best as we can… and wanting to occassionally celebrate the good on social media.
It’s time for a cup of chai I think. What do you think?